Monday in Novi Sad, Serbia.
We woke up today to a beautiful blue sky, warm sun, and hodge-podge breakfast at Hotel Vigor, with the server that I don’t think ever goes home. He carried our bazillion suitcases up two flights of stairs, served us dinner right after, has served us breakfast daily since our arrival, making pot after pot of rich, dark coffee. He is a picture of so many Serbian men and women working daily to make a living for themselves and their families. We are discovering some of the beautiful ways that the Serbian people take such pride in their nation, communities, and families. The women that have invited us into their space have challenged my ideas of what courage, strength, perseverance, and endurance look like.
Today we had the privilege of visiting Vesna’s pregnancy care centre. It is sacred space in the heart of Novi Sad. She is a woman who saw a huge need and labored for years to see her dream of women in her nation and surrounding areas supported in the midst of crisis pregnancies. What she has discovered is a lack of support for women suffering abuse, grieving miscarriages, looking for adoption organizations that are honoring of the birth mom and the adoptive parents, safe sex education, women struggling with addictions, etc. Over the last few days we have witnessed an inspiring process: women sharing their own stories and laying bare the areas of great need in their own country by listening to one another and beginning to share their heartfelt dreams of what would begin to fill the gaps. One woman spoke of opening recovery homes for women struggling with addictions, as nothing like this exists here in Serbia. She is currently completing her BA in Theology, hoping to continue with a Masters in Counseling. She is a courageous woman dreaming on behalf of her Serbian sisters.
Gwen, Idelette, Britni, and I met yet another beautifully courageous woman, Devna, a wife and mother of five boys aged 6 to 16. We were invited into her apartment with another Vesna--a coworker of Vesna’s at the care centre--this afternoon, and as she served us the rest of her son’s layered blackberry birthday cake from earlier this morning, she shared bits of her story and the reality of everyday life for a Serbian family. She spoke of facades. How a building would be repainted to be made beautiful, but still had no water on the inside. How the park her boys played in had been destroyed by rambunctious youth at a nearby high school only to be fixed during the summer vacation with nothing in place to ensure destruction would not be repeated. Money spent without consideration, or what Idelette described as fixing the symptoms without addressing the cause. She shared stories of finding ways to keep two of her sons in the music academy when they had no finances for such things (her 12 year old son played the piano for us with incredible talent and her eldest son, David, plays the bassoon, clarinet, and guitar). She spoke of many moments sitting in her apartment, pouring over bills praying and believing that somehow her God would continue to take care of her family while she and her husband continued to work hard. She declared, “every woman in Serbia is an amazing woman.” In agreement, Vesna confirmed, “every woman in Serbia makes something out of nothing.” These are women who know the truth in the statement “nothing without effort.”
As I sat at the small kitchen table, sitting on a backless oak chair straight from American Furniture Warehouse, looking around the small apartment flat wondering how 7 people thrive as a family in such small quarters, listening to this passionate, gracious, generous woman, I found myself stroking the silver pendant hanging around my neck. It is a silver seal that reads in French, “nothing without effort.” On it is a picture of a cherub reaching up into a tree. Sitting before me was a woman who absolutely embodies this statement on a daily basis. Two of my dearest friends gave me this pendant when I graduated university, and, on learning Gwen’s tendencies to give away other people’s jewelry (ahem…) I had jokingly told her she better not get any ideas. But, as I sat across from Devna, something inside me knew this pendant was never mine to keep. As I unhooked the clasp from around my neck, I understood that there was something extraordinary about this ordinary Serbian mother. I understood that as I put this pendant around her neck I was putting it around every single one of my Serbian sisters. It is in the ordinary that they are indeed extraordinary and will together begin to lift each other up- believing in one another, supporting each other, loving each other. Because they know how to make something from nothing: with great effort.
Tomorrow we say goodbye. Thank you Serbia for inviting us in, you are forever sealed on our hearts.
Thank you for your continued love and support.
With love,
Emma for Britni, Gwen, Idelette, Donna, Karen, Diana, Robyn, and Anna
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